It’s been quite a year! Lots of highs and lows. Numerous stops and starts. Unexpected tears and endless laughter.
We’ve been to the pediatrician, the therapist, the pediatric endocrinologist, the pharmacy, the lab (for blood work), the courthouse and the passport office. Hunter started on testosterone, experienced his voice changing, grew a little taller and even began to have more of an appetite (some days) especially when the day started with three slices of homemade French toast dipped in real maple syrup.
Not only did we officially begin using male pronouns, but Hunter got a revised birth certificate, a new passport and a legal name change. He sailed through driver’s ed and is the proud owner of a “permit” with his legal name and male gender marker.
Hunter’s confidence swelled in direct proportion to the amount of love and acceptance he received from family, friends, the community — strangers he may never meet.
Leelah Alcorn committed suicide because she could no longer live with parents who insisted on calling her a he knowing they would never acknowledge the girl she was born to be. Ally Moms was born. Jay Ralko lost his battle with his demons. I spoke to a room full of Jay’s friends assuring them, that as a mom, I would love our transgender children, always.
We shared our journey publicly. Hunter’s story appeared on the cover of The Detroit Jewish News, The Detroit Free Press and USAToday.com. We organized an event for transgender youth and families where attendance exceeded our wildest expectations as nearly 250 spilled out into the chapel lobby. We founded a non-profit organization, Stand with Trans, to benefit and support transgender youth (and their families) so kids would have the tools to feel confident, validated and loved.
photo credit: Regina Boone, The Detroit Free Press, staff photographer
What a ride this past year has been. What a surprising 16 years. From the much anticipated birth of our second child to tom-boy tantrums, academic angst and social anxiety, Hunter has become a true mensch. He has come into his own over the last few years. He doesn’t focus on the rough patches but on the fact that he has gotten past them. The transformation from an unhappy, moody, withdrawn, dysphoric adolescent to a positive, loving, open, confident 16 year old has been nothing short of remarkable.
Hunter is kind and caring. He is compassionate. He understands that his weekly time at the Friendship Circle means so much more than just an after school activity. He is tolerant and patient with those less nimble. Hunter is not your typical 16 year old in many ways and very much a teenager in others. He knows what he likes from music to television to video games. He is not influenced by his peers. He has worked really hard to be who he is at this moment in time.
Together, we have traversed the past year. As his mom, I showed Hunter that he was loved unconditionally. He knows that even when I am angry or disappointed (in a choice he made) I will ALWAYS love him. I will NEVER turn my back on him. I will FOREVER be his champion.
Hunter, happy 16th birthday, son. I cannot wait to see what the next year will bring. You are a beautiful soul, a piece of my heart, a force to be reckoned with.
Call Him Hunter 
This made me cry and gives me hope that our son will start to turn around too.
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May you go from strength to strength. Happy birthday, Hunter!
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Finally started attending a trans support group. Went to the first meeting on Saturday. As I expected, the only trans guy there…but they also want to be open to parents of trans* kids, partners of trans* people, and our allies in general. Several different North Jersey and NE PA GLBT groups pouring their resources together to try and help us, because they don’t know how to help us, and want our input. For trans* adults and youth, too. 🙂
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Happy Birthday, Hunter! And what a year you’ve had, huh? It sounds very promising. 🙂
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Thanks!
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HAPPY BIRTHDAY HUNTER. I’M ALSO THE PROUDEST MOM IN THE WORLD TO HAVE MY SON WHO IS TRANSGENDER. I DON’T THINK OF HIM THAT WAY, I THINK OF HIM AS MY BABY THAT I GAVE BIRTH TO AND HE MEANS MORE TO ME IN THE WHOLEWIDE WORLD. I’M PROUD OF YOU FOR WHO YOU ARE. ENJOY LIFE. YOU DESERVE IT.
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Thank you, Annette.
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But of course. My child turned me on to this sight and I’m so glad I joined. My child Sam has the support of me and his dad one million percent. That’s our baby. Wish all the parents of transgender would only look at their child and love them and hug them and tell them they have only love for them. Im so happy for this sight. Thank you.
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Wow. Glad you found us, too.
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Are you in Michigan?
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PENNSYLVANIA
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Ok — just curious!
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That’s ok, curious is good. Is this Hunter or his mom that I’m replying to.
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Hunter’s mom. I’m Roz.
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Hi Roz, sorry so late. Was on with my family in florida. Would love to be in touch with you by txt or calling. I can give you my number if you would like. I’m sure we would have a lot to talk about. Getting my stuff done for work but I’ll be up. I don’t know how to get back to you without being on here.
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You can call or text …go to the Ally Moms page in the blog and click through the link. I’m listed. Looking forward to hearing from you.
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Reading this makes me so happy! Hunter is very lucky to have you for his family. I have friends in the trans community and I speak out often but living it day to day can be so much more stressful and satisfying than I’ve experienced. Happy Birthday, Hunter, and good luck to both of you on your continued journey.
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